The Start.

Do you know how many times I've begun a weight loss journey only to end up throwing it all away less than a month later? It's true - I'm starting this not even knowing if I'll keep up with it. I'm starting it with all the momentum in the world, yes, but there's no guarantees here. However, I am combining a lot of things that I have picked up along the way on my "previous journeys" in order to give myself the best shot at really doing this, and doing it right.

I came across this thing on Prevention and My Virtual Model where you can create a model of yourself, and you can compare your current weight with your goal weight and how the system proposes you will look. So, according to this, here is me now:


5'5" and 252 lbs. You might wonder why I don't have a real picture up here. Don't worry, I'll get on that. I am the heaviest I've ever been. I know it didn't happen overnight, but it feels like it did. I've never been thin, but I feel like I looked in the mirror one day, and suddenly there was a bit of a double-chin. Not always, mind you. But at times, I notice it and I wonder where it came from. Or the fact that the size 16 jeans I wore throughout high school gave way to size 18, and sometimes 20. I found myself thinking - where the hell did this all come from? I don't have a unique answer for that question (I mean, a lot of food, lack of exercise, it's all pretty obvious), however, I do have a little added problem that makes it all the more infuriating to me that I've allowed everything to spin out of control like this:

I have Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS). It definitely plays a role in my weight, especially the extra fat I suddenly find myself carrying around my middle that was never there before.

So now I have a goal of losing 100 lbs eventually. If I even lose 50 lbs, I'll be happy. Hell, I'd like to lose 20 lbs right now-- but 100 is my ultimate goal, and who knows from there? I'd like to be curvy, healthy, but not fat.

I found another website that is just awesome for anyone trying to lose weight, or even just acheive or maintain a healthy lifestyle: SparkPeople. It's 100% free and you can register, pick a goal (weight loss/gain or just healthy lifestyle), and it helps you track nutrition, calories (consumed and burned), measurements, goals, and there are thousands of different groups and message boards to join in on. You can also set up your own little "sparkpage" and track your acheivments there. There's also a huge database of different recipes and you have the option of letting them design a mealplan and excersize regimen for you, or just kind of doing it yourself by trial and error. Did I mention it's free? Yup. FREE. I'm on there as LESSTOLOVE12. Check it out. We can be friends. And you can spy on how many calories I've eaten today. Feel free to scold when I go overboard!

So far? It's 3:23 PM and I've consumed 580 calories. I'm about to go make myself a lunch and do some laundry. My literary studies paper can wait!